My son Noah asked me the other day why he couldn’t have a car right now. He said, he knows he’s going to get it eventually. He knows what make, model and color it will be. And he knows he will have to pay insurance for it LOL.

So why wait until he was older? Why can’t he have it now? He asked.

It was a pretty good argument. I mean, I wouldn’t dare stop him from dreaming it, seeing it and believing that it’s already his.

But he IS 7 and can’t drive yet.

So it got me thinking about humans. The roller coaster we go on mentally when we want something.

From believing it’s not possible for us, to making random attempts, to going all in and making it happen…sometimes.

Then, repeat.

And through it all, we forget the simple fact:

We can’t run before we walk, and we can’t walk before we crawl.

Being a leader, boss, world-changer takes time.

It’s like I told Noah:

Sure, I can get you the Mustang you want now, but what will you do with it? You can’t drive, and you don’t know anything about cars.

To which he replied, EXACTLY like adults do at times to their innerselves (not a word, don’t care) as justification to stay on the roller coaster: “I do know about cars, mom. And I can drive. Let me show you. I can do it.”

Knowing that he can’t truly drive yet, I KNOW if I had given him my car keys, he would have tried. Because he believes it, he feels it in his bones.

I guess in a lot of ways it was like a mirror was staring back at me. Saying, Vanessa, yes, you’ve had it all, you lost it all, and now you’re getting even more back, but hey? It takes time, woman!

And I know a lot of you are the same if not worse place, wondering when the heck is this thing finally going to work for me?

When will I finally take off?!

When will it be MY time?

I am doing everything I am supposed to be doing, and it’s not happening fast enough.

Sound familiar? That’s because you’re forgetting that great things, like the masterpiece you are trying to create of yourself, TAKE TIME.

Be easy with yourself.

Yes, hustle.

Yes, do the work.

Yes, go all in like a mad person and live your calling.

But, please, stop beating yourself up when you don’t make that leap in a day, week, month or year.

Instead of focusing on where you are not, focus on where you are.

Serve the 1 client like they paid you a million dollars. Bask in the 45 minutes you did go to the gym. Celebrate the one time you and your partner had better communication. Treat the body you have now like you KNOW that 6 pack is on the way.

Embrace the failures and lessons learned. Force yourself to find the good in everything along the way.

Don’t just say you do. Do it.

Remind yourself daily that you are doing everything you can do RIGHT NOW with where you are RIGHT NOW.

Being the person you want to be takes time.

Not days, weeks, months, years or decades. It takes as much time as YOU need to get there. To fail, to learn, to rise and to reach as high as you want.

And setting unrealistic expectations, goals that sound and look pretty but have no feasibility or genuine energy behind them will only continue making you feel like a failure.

I’m not saying to put your dreams on hold. This is not a justification for your inaction, indecision and total lack of doing the necessary work. Please don’t get that twisted.

This is about realizing that if you want to live like most people can’t, you have to do what most people won’t.

Every day.

Every week.

Every month.

Every year.

On repeat.

It’s like Noah and the mustang. He KNOWS the car is his, but he’s not ready for that level because he hasn’t mastered the level he’s at now.

And the one after that.
And the one after THAT.

You’re no different.

No matter where you are right now, if you’re reading this, you’re searching for the next level.

The million-dollar business.

The amazing relationship.

The great body.

The freedom.


And why shouldn’t you want all of that and more?

You deserve it.

You are working so hard for it.

It is your birthright.

But sometimes, okay let’s face it, most of the time, you’re as impatient as Noah. I can remember too many times when I was, too.

You don’t even realize that to serve anyone especially the masses, you must first serve yourself.

And, to serve ten, you must first serve one. Be happy with that ONE.

And master that to the point where you feel it in your bones and your inner self GUIDES you to search and find the next level.

You can’t skip ahead until you’re ready. Until your mindset is ready. That’s why you have tests and trials to strengthen it. You can’t jump to the front until you’re emotionally, intellectually and psychically there.

If you say you want to be THAT person, then you have to embrace THAT journey.

Just remember –

It’s always YOUR move,


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Vanessa Rende is a Public Speaker, Entrepreneur, Business Consultant and Writer with over 12 years experience with helping businesses and entrepreneurs across the globe grow, starting with the leadership from the inside out. You can find her on social media most active on Facebook and Instagram.