When I was 23, I lied on a job application so I could make more money and move to NYC.
One day, I woke up and I was sick of everything in my life.
I decided that I was going to fulfill my dream of living in New York City.
At the time, I hoped to get discovered for having a unique, raspy and sensual singing voice.
I told my boyfriend at the time that I was leaving with or without him.
I started applying at jobs in New York, telling companies I’d be there in the next month or two permanently, so they’d consider looking at my resume and ideally, wanting to interview me.
A few jobs responded, but my lie about almost being a resident of New York caught up to me when I couldn’t coordinate any interview dates.
Then, after a month or so, I was able to make it up to New York for 1 day and 3 interviews.
I had never been to New York, and had no idea how to get around. I was alone and had very little money.
I grew up in Miami, but nothing prepared me for the craziness of NYC. Even so, terrified as I was once I saw the real NYC (not just the cool parts they show in movies like they do Miami!), I wanted it more than ever.
All my interviews flopped that day except for one that wanted to hire me, but requested copies of a Degree the job required, which I never pretended to possess; and copies of my tax returns to show my previous income, which *had* to be within a certain range for me to be considered.
Guess I didn’t read that in the job description when I applied.
That was the end of that.
So I kept searching, just knowing that somehow I’d land a job and have no excuse to NOT pack my things and go.
After a couple of months, another big company reached out to me in response to my job application.
I lied about how much money I was making at my job in Florida to impress them – without thinking twice.
For some reason, my experience was enough, but something about them wanting to see what I was earning had me thinking that if my pay didn’t reflect my experience, in a New York cost-of-living sort of way, they probably wouldn’t have hired me either.
So I bumped my annual income by $15k on my application, and to my surprise, they never asked to see any proof.
They told me later that they felt I was underpaid in FL the moment they saw my resume and application, and that’s why they never bothered to even ask for proof.
In retrospect, I know that job was meant for me even if I had been a hot dog cart operator in Downtown Miami, but at the time, all I could do was say yes first, think later.
Then, my worst nightmare came true when I, again, couldn’t meet the hiring manager at the New York office for an interview.
We went back and forth as one of my excuses turned into many. I didn’t expect them to hire me without interviewing me in person, but I was wishing a miracle would happen.
I was living paycheck-to-paycheck, working a mortgage office job in the mornings and bartending and/or pulling graveyard shifts at a Circle K at night to pay for my bills.
I didn’t know how I was going to do it, but even through the worry I knew in my core somehow I would figure it out.
Still, it was a trying time for me and I felt so much shame.
How could someone with my experience at such a young age, making the awesome NY-type income I was making (allegedly), not be able to jump on a plane for a simple interview in New York?
I felt embarrassed and confused that I had made it happen but couldn’t follow through with it.
Why the hell did I jump into this without even knowing where I was going to live in New York?
As it turned out, the hiring manager was based out of Dallas, TX.
She wanted to meet me so bad, she was willing to travel to the company’s Jacksonville office to interview me for the New York position – instead at of their New York location.
All I had to do was drive 6-7 hours from South Florida to seal the deal.
I said yes, of course. Without thinking twice, blinking or even taking the next breath.
I said yes.
I didn’t know how my beat up 1996 Honda Civic was going to make to the Georgia border, but I knew I was going to find a way, whatever it took.
In the two weeks I waited for our interview, I almost ate myself to death, barely slept, and my upper limit went crazy. (I had no idea what an upper limit was back then, but later correlated it all)
Two flat tires, I got sick and had every fight imaginable with known and unknown people.
Every cell in my body couldn’t believe that interview was happening.
And even though I wanted to be undoubtedly confident, a part of me still didn’t believe I could come this far and actually get the job.
They offered me the job.
I said yes. Again.
I had to move to New York within the next month, and I didn’t know how I was going to do it because I hadn’t allowed myself to get completely bogged down by those details. #win
No friends, family or money to even rent a place to sleep in.
It didn’t matter. I had said yes and a way would be found, revealed or made.
I sold all my stuff on Craigslist and reminded my boyfriend that he was free to do whatever he wanted.
Me and my Yorkie, Peanut, would be fine, I told him as I pictured us sleeping in my car.
He decided to go along for the ride, and years later I realized that it was never a coincidence that he came for a short time, served his purpose, and was sent off (by me).
Although, I had to dump him and literally pack his things and buy his ticket back home, if it wasn’t for him and his long-lost aunt living on Long island, I wouldn’t have had a place to rest my first two weeks living in New York.
We drove up and got there two days before I was supposed to start work. The morning I was supposed to start, my car wouldn’t start.
The annual January-February Long Island blizzard had made its way, and my little beat up FL car couldn’t deal with the cold.
I had to dig my car out of the snow, wait for it to defrost, and hope that it started or else I was literally screwed in a new state, no money, and all out of fresh excuses to my new job.
I spent the day digging out my car out.
Again, I had no idea HOW it was going to happen, but I had decided that it would. End of story.
My car started the next day. I survived the crazy trip over two bridges, traffic jams and countless crazy NY drivers, and was in my own place by the time my first paycheck was deposited.
That was the beginning of my soul-searching journey.
That was when I first realized all the times I had done things like that; made decisions like that; and ultimately, CATAPULTED myself towards my true desires –
By saying yes first, and thinking later.
By listening to that soft, sometimes subtle voice that always seems to know what’s right and wrong.
There have been countless times in my life when I have followed my soul blindly and madly like this.
Not even considering risks, dangers, money, living arrangements, or giving any mind to fears.
It was just an automatic hell yes felt in my core. Right now, YES.
I didn’t need to know how.
It was decided and that’s it.
Can I tell you a secret? It ALWAYS pushed me to the next level.
ALWAYS. 100% OF THE TIME.
I never would have experienced so many amazing, life-changing experienced had I not said YES.
That job went so well, I got noticed by another company I frequently had to work with.
An immediate raise and also a chance to be a part of a group of a bunch of geniuses who were responsible for writing the compliance technical specifications for the company’s data mining proprietary software.
I felt so special! They were stealing me from my new NY job!
I was offered a job in their compliance department at the Connecticut branch.
$15k more in salary + 15% annual bonus + company phone. Done deal.
I said yes. Again.
It wasn’t long before I noticed an exciting open position in that new company’s Consulting department, traveling the world and working on different projects.
I was new at the company, but I just had to say yes to the urge to apply for such an amazing opportunity.
Even though the only voices I could hear in my head were boldly telling reminding me of all the reasons why it was a bad idea to go after it.
So I applied anyway.
And I was offered that job in the consulting department.
I said yes. Again.
That allowed me to move from CT back to FL to be closer to my family.
Specifically, my middle sister who was 18, having a baby, and had subsequently found out she was battling renal cancer.
All at the same time.
I had no idea when I said yes to the consulting job that there had been a cancer eating away at her kidney for years, but God knew.
I am so glad I listened. That baby is 12 now, and my sister just had her third son.
I can tell you of dozens of moments in my life where I have said yes first and thought later and never regretted it.
Job opportunities levels higher than my experience with my having little-to-no real understanding of the position, I would say yes.
I’d learn the job on the fly. Do amazing. Get recognition as if I had been doing it for years. Then be hungry for more.
A consulting opportunity living in Barcelona for a month, traveling back and forth to Madrid, and leaving my life behind in FL for the entire time, including a relationship I thought at the time would result in marriage.
I said yes.
And after being in Spain and seeing him for who he truly was, a person that couldn’t handle my power and drive, I said yes to dumping his ass and following the gut feeling I had always had about not marrying him.
I said yes.
Being offered a consulting opportunity to travel the 50 states alone in a rental as part of a huge due diligence team auditing all the branches of one of the biggest mergers in history.
I said yes.
Quitting that amazing corporate consulting job and turning down an all expense paid relocation to a cubicle in Denver to instead start my own consulting firm –
I was the sole breadwinner in my home at the time. The previous year, I had just gotten married, bought a house and had a baby.
All in the same year.
I didn’t know how I would do it. But it didn’t matter. Because my false sense of freedom being a corporate consultant had come to an end.
And when it came down to beautiful Denver and their cubicle, or creating something from the ground up that was mine and gave me real freedom, no paycheck, bonus or bitching fest from my spouse at the time mattered.
I said yes to my soul. I turned down that relocation. Got severance. Started my own consulting firm.
Hit $100k in 60 days.
Within 18 months, multiple six figures.
Deep into what I felt at the time was the closest I had ever been to God and being accepted and loved by God, my already fractured marriage broke into pieces.
The only friends and family (in law) I had turned their backs on me for even considering a divorce.
Not even the church wanted a part in my choosing to divorce at first although they eventually did come back and tell me they understood.
But I was alone in a city with no fiends, family, support and terrified of being the successful consultant and entrepreneur I was.
My two biggest fears were hurting my son and damaging him for life, and pissing God off to the point where he would never forgive me.
Religious doctrine is a bitch.
It was one of the hardest things I’ve done, walking away from that marriage in pure fear of being disowned by God.
But still, something inside me told me I was loved and that everything would be ok if I followed my gut/soul.
I said yes and pursued the divorce.
I doubted. I feared. I worried. I stressed.
But I always knew it was the right choice for everyone involved.
And it was.
You see, every single time, you take action in listening to THAT voice inside you that knows what you REALLY want and what you need to do (or not do) to have it, you will always move in the right direction.
Because the YES you hear before you start to obsesses about the HOW it’s gonna happen, is the only green light you need to just follow, trust and surrender.
The moment you find yourself trying to dot every ‘i’ and cross every ’t’ BEFORE you decide that YES, you’ve taken a wrong fork in the road.
Don’t you see? You’re not supposed to have it all figured out and then say yes.
That’s having to see to believe and thats just not the way this works!
I’m not saying planning, organizing, and strategies don’t work. I am a business genius, after all. #selfproclaimed
But all those processes ARE NOT, I repeat, ARE NOT, part of the hell yes.
They are what happens AFTER you’ve said yes to what you want.
AFTER you’ve given the down payment (aka HELL YES) of TRUST.
Then the planning, organizing and strategies happen on their own.
Everything falls into place just as it should.
Because you said yes first and thought later.
Because you chose to BELIEVE and TRUST.
Why am I telling you all these stories?
Because I want you to know that the YES is always in you.
Because I have made and used countless excuses and reasons to NOT say yes. And I’ve regretted it every time.
Whatever it is that you truly desire –
Quit your job
Leave the boy/girl
Make more money
Move to another city/stater/country
Start a business
W H A T E V E R it is your soul yearns for, you have the power this instant, RIGHT NOW, to say yes to it.
The only reason you haven’t or don’t is because you’re searching for answers you don’t need to know…..yet.
You don’t deserve to know those answers, or the how, until you commit to the YES.
You’re worrying about if the plant will blossom without even planting the seed.
You have to understand that saying yes to what you really want, your deepest desires, your biggest goals and vision for your life –
doesn’t come with all the answers as to HOW it’s all going to happen. Not at first.
You have a purpose so much bigger than your current reality.
Stop telling yourself that you’re being responsible, planning, organizing, blah blah blah.
Stop searching for and allowing roadblocks that are meant to test you
To make your alignment to your true desires that much stronger.
JUST SAY YES FIRST